duckyshoelaze

Hello to all members, passers-by, curious onlookers, and shy lurkers, and welcome to our regular daily check-in post. Just leave a comment below to let us know how your current projects are progressing, or even if they're not.

Checking in is NOT compulsory, check in as often or as seldom as you want, this community isn't about pressure it's about encouragement, motivation, and support. Crafting is meant to be fun, and what's more fun than sharing achievements and seeing the wonderful things everyone else is creating?

There may also occasionally be questions, but again you don't have to answer them, they're just a way of getting to know each other a bit better.

This Week's Question: Where do you do most of your crafting?

If anyone has any questions of their own about the community, or suggestions for tags, questions to be asked on the check-in posts, or if anyone is interested in playing check-in host for a week here on the community, which would entail putting up the daily check-in posts and responding to comments, go to the Questions & Suggestions post and leave a comment.

I now declare this Check-In OPEN!

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badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

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magid posting in

agonyaunt

From today’s NY Times, in the weekly Social Q’s column.

Our youngest, who is 37 and uses they/them pronouns, has a long history of psychological problems. They sent a text informing us that they no longer want to interact with family members, and that if we want to meet with them, they require an advocate to be present. This child lives in our second home. They don’t pay rent, but they have a job that covers food and health insurance costs. We’re not sure what caused the break. They had a very bad interaction with our son, and we asked them to work it out themselves. But our son wants nothing to do with his sibling, and my husband wants to stop communicating with them, too. He says they are toxic. I am heartbroken. What should I do?

MOTHER

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conuly posting in

agonyaunt

Dear Pay Dirt,
My husband and I are fortunate enough to be homeowners with pretty good credit. We get credit card and loan offers in the mail all the time. I’ve been trying to declutter our house, and junk mail is a big issue. Everything goes on the entry way table and its always overflowing. I set up a recycle bin in the entry way for just such physical spam, but my husband won’t use it because he says we have to SHRED all those offers, and our shredder is not big enough to deal with all the constant clutter! Also, the shredder is in his office, and he only gets to it every other month or so, so the workflow doesn’t keep up.

I know that’s the best, most secure way to deal with junk. But really, our recycle bin is kept in the garage until the night before the garbage is collected., then we roll it out to the curb. We always put other recycling on top of the mail.

Is it really that dangerous to just toss those mailers as is? Maybe tear them up by hand first? Please help!
—Drowning in Junk Mail

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conuly posting in

agonyaunt

Dear How to Do It,
I’m an 18-year-old guy, and I’ve recently had to move in with my older sister and her husband. My brother-in-law, “Kenneth,” is honestly the most amazing guy I’ve ever met. He’s kind, funny, and built like a Greek god. He’s also super traditional and religious, which is part of why I’m so confused.
Lately, I feel like there’s this insane sexual tension between us. He walks around the house in just sweatpants with no underwear, and the bulge is so obvious. I feel like he has to know what he’s doing. Today, he was working out shirtless, and I asked if I could just sit and watch. He said yes, no questions asked, and worked out for a full hour. He was lifting weights and flexing right in front of me.

To me, this is a clear sign. A straight guy wouldn’t let another guy just watch him work out, would he? He has to be into it. But he’s also my sister’s husband, and he’s super religious, so it’s all so complicated. I’m starting to think about ways to make a move, to show him I’m interested. I’m convinced he wants it too. My question is: Am I right? Is he giving me signals, or am I imagining this?
—Confused and Craving

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badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

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badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

Current Mood: tired
Current Location: my desk

badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

Current Mood: tired
Current Location: my desk

badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

Hello to all members, passers-by, curious onlookers, and shy lurkers, and welcome to our regular daily check-in post. Just leave a comment below to let us know how your current projects are progressing, or even if they're not.

Checking in is NOT compulsory, check in as often or as seldom as you want, this community isn't about pressure it's about encouragement, motivation, and support. Crafting is meant to be fun, and what's more fun than sharing achievements and seeing the wonderful things everyone else is creating?

There may also occasionally be questions, but again you don't have to answer them, they're just a way of getting to know each other a bit better.

This Week's Question: What is a craft that you tried but abandoned?

If anyone has any questions of their own about the community, or suggestions for tags, questions to be asked on the check-in posts, or if anyone is interested in playing check-in host for a week here on the community, which would entail putting up the daily check-in posts and responding to comments, go to the Questions & Suggestions post and leave a comment.

I now declare this Check-In OPEN!

Current Mood: tired
Current Location: my desk

conuly posting in

agonyaunt

Dear Carolyn: My friends think I’m stupid. I’m a high school junior, and I go to a highly academically competitive school, where it is expected by my peers that you are supposed to take at least three AP classes. My closest friends are taking five. They are constantly stressed, overworked and burned out. My peers believe the only way to get into a “good” college (whatever that means) is to take as many AP classes as possible and to get the highest SAT score as possible. This, I know, is ridiculous on so many levels, but I stay out of it.

Lately, however, my friends have been shaming me for only taking one AP class, and for taking one standardized test vs. the other. I am going to college for musical theater, and admissions for those programs rely primarily on auditions, not grades. So why on earth would I put myself through so much stress if it won’t affect my college admissions? I’ve tried to explain this to my friends, but they think they know better than I. Additionally, they equate my taking only one AP class with being stupid. In the AP class I do take, my friend consistently shuts down and mocks my ideas with her other friends.

I’ve tried to mention the reasons I don’t take too many hard classes, but it’s like talking to a wall. I’ve also explained that since I was diagnosed with ADHD a year ago, I am now more aware of what I can handle. When all else failed, I even mentioned once that I have an IQ of 135 (tested when I was diagnosed with ADHD). I am actually quite smart. My friends stared at me and said, “Yeah… I think they lied to you.”

This hurts my feelings and happens so often that I’ve even started to believe I am stupid, despite all evidence to the contrary. Now I’ve started subconsciously playing into the “token dumb friend” stereotype because that is all I’m surrounded with. Should I not respond and ignore it?
— Stupidly Smart

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badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

Hello to all members, passers-by, curious onlookers, and shy lurkers, and welcome to our regular daily check-in post. Just leave a comment below to let us know how your current projects are progressing, or even if they're not.

Checking in is NOT compulsory, check in as often or as seldom as you want, this community isn't about pressure it's about encouragement, motivation, and support. Crafting is meant to be fun, and what's more fun than sharing achievements and seeing the wonderful things everyone else is creating?

There may also occasionally be questions, but again you don't have to answer them, they're just a way of getting to know each other a bit better.

This Week's Question: What is a craft that you tried but abandoned?

If anyone has any questions of their own about the community, or suggestions for tags, questions to be asked on the check-in posts, or if anyone is interested in playing check-in host for a week here on the community, which would entail putting up the daily check-in posts and responding to comments, go to the Questions & Suggestions post and leave a comment.

I now declare this Check-In OPEN!

Current Location: my desk

badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

Hello to all members, passers-by, curious onlookers, and shy lurkers, and welcome to our regular daily check-in post. Just leave a comment below to let us know how your current projects are progressing, or even if they're not.

Checking in is NOT compulsory, check in as often or as seldom as you want, this community isn't about pressure it's about encouragement, motivation, and support. Crafting is meant to be fun, and what's more fun than sharing achievements and seeing the wonderful things everyone else is creating?

There may also occasionally be questions, but again you don't have to answer them, they're just a way of getting to know each other a bit better.

This Week's Question: What is a craft that you tried but abandoned?

If anyone has any questions of their own about the community, or suggestions for tags, questions to be asked on the check-in posts, or if anyone is interested in playing check-in host for a week here on the community, which would entail putting up the daily check-in posts and responding to comments, go to the Questions & Suggestions post and leave a comment.

I now declare this Check-In OPEN!

Current Mood: tired
Current Location: my desk

petrea_mitchell posting in

agonyaunt

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conuly posting in

agonyaunt

Dear Prudence,

I’m a 21-year-old college student living in a house with five other students. There are three women and three men. We’re having an issue keeping our kitchen clean, and I am the only one who consistently cleans. I keep the floors and counters clean, wash the piles of dishes in the sink, wash dish towels, etc. Anytime I’ve asked people to chip in, they never follow through. I’ve tried not doing the cleaning, but then the kitchen gets disgusting and I end up caving.

I’m not completely innocent when it comes to not always washing my dishes immediately and being messy, but I feel like I clean more often than anyone else. A general chore chart doesn’t work, and I am tired of feeling like my roommate’s mother. How can I get them to take some initiative and do more of the heavy lifting that always falls on me?

—Not a Mother to Five at 21

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conuly posting in

agonyaunt

DEAR HARRIETTE: I've recently gone sober for health reasons, and it wasn't an easy decision, especially because my social life has always involved going out for drinks, celebrating with cocktails and bonding over happy hour. When my friends and I went out last weekend, they were pressuring me to drink. I ordered a mocktail, and almost immediately, my friends started to laugh and said that it would be fine to just have one drink. This surprised me because I never thought that my friends would try to force me to do something that would actively have a negative effect on my health. It made me feel unsupported and, frankly, disrespected. At the same time, I don't want to lose my friendships or isolate myself socially just because I'm choosing not to drink. Now I'm anxious about future outings. I don't want every dinner or celebration to turn into a debate about my personal choices. How should I talk to my friends about setting boundaries without making things awkward? -- Sober

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badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

Hello to all members, passers-by, curious onlookers, and shy lurkers, and welcome to our regular daily check-in post. Just leave a comment below to let us know how your current projects are progressing, or even if they're not.

Checking in is NOT compulsory, check in as often or as seldom as you want, this community isn't about pressure it's about encouragement, motivation, and support. Crafting is meant to be fun, and what's more fun than sharing achievements and seeing the wonderful things everyone else is creating?

There may also occasionally be questions, but again you don't have to answer them, they're just a way of getting to know each other a bit better.

This Week's Question: What is a craft that you tried but abandoned?

If anyone has any questions of their own about the community, or suggestions for tags, questions to be asked on the check-in posts, or if anyone is interested in playing check-in host for a week here on the community, which would entail putting up the daily check-in posts and responding to comments, go to the Questions & Suggestions post and leave a comment.

I now declare this Check-In OPEN!

Current Mood: tired
Current Location: my desk

conuly posting in

agonyaunt

Dear Eric: My husband and his ex-wife have 50/50 custody of their 15-year-old son. I despise this child. He is completely useless, rude, disrespectful, selfish, ungrateful and lazy. All he does is stare at his computer screen. I have carefully planned my entire life schedule around his schedule, to avoid being at the house on the days he is there for my husband's 50 percent custody.

My husband has just told me that his ex-wife is moving to another state far away and that he is going to take full custody of his son. This means the child I despise so much is now going to be living with me at my house full time, every single day, and there's nothing I can do about it. My husband refuses to let his son move away with his ex. How do I manage this?

– Fed Up

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badly_knitted posting in

get_knitted

Hello to all members, passers-by, curious onlookers, and shy lurkers, and welcome to our regular daily check-in post. Just leave a comment below to let us know how your current projects are progressing, or even if they're not.

Checking in is NOT compulsory, check in as often or as seldom as you want, this community isn't about pressure it's about encouragement, motivation, and support. Crafting is meant to be fun, and what's more fun than sharing achievements and seeing the wonderful things everyone else is creating?

There may also occasionally be questions, but again you don't have to answer them, they're just a way of getting to know each other a bit better.

This Week's Question: What is a craft that you tried but abandoned?

If anyone has any questions of their own about the community, or suggestions for tags, questions to be asked on the check-in posts, or if anyone is interested in playing check-in host for a week here on the community, which would entail putting up the daily check-in posts and responding to comments, go to the Questions & Suggestions post and leave a comment.

I now declare this Check-In OPEN!

Current Mood: tired
Current Location: my desk

cereta posting in

agonyaunt

As some of you already know, our wonderful

minoanmiss left us on March 3rd. Her loved ones asked us not to make any public announcements for reasons involving her family of origin, but we've been given permission to announce to the community now.

Those here in

agonyaunt will remember her for her contributions from Ask A Manager, and her insightful comments on family, found family, and other topics. The wider fannish community will remember her for her amazing fiction and her art, particularly her drawings of Minoan culture. Others will remember her for her amazing fruitcake and other culinary adventures.

sabotabby created this lovely portrait. I think I will try to remember her this way.

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duckyshoelaze

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